Wish
by Rawkin Paradox
Summary: You want to hear about the deal I'm making? [Selphie centric] [mentioned Kaiora & Selphiku]


_**genres .:.**__ friendship & angst  
**characters .:.**__ Selphie & Kairi, mentioned Kaiora, Selphiku  
**song lyrics .:.**__ Placebo's "Running Up That Hill"  
**disclaimer .:.**__ Don't own Kingdom Hearts or its characters. The song is copyrighted to Placebo and Kate Bush and whoever wrote it.  
**notes .:.**__ This is horrible. I mean, seriously freakin' horrible. Blame the plot bums for attacking me when I'm suffering Writer's Block. The song used, however, is awesome, and psychological. It's amazing._

**Wish**  
(_♫__You want to hear about the deal I'm making?__ ♫_)

Selphie held the starfish to her chest in a tight grip, clutching it as if her very life depended on it. She listened as she stood among the waves, listening to them as they ebbed and flowed, etching traces of their arrival in the sand. It wasn't all that long ago that she and her friends had ran among the waves, laughing and carrying on as if time had stopped and their childhood was immortal. But that was so long ago. Now, her boys Tidus and Wakka had grown up and moved on, absorbed into their blitzball and their girlfriends, and Sora and Riku were off saving the worlds and their inhabitants. Kairi had been the only friend she had left.

She sighed, the memories almost too painful to recall. She remembered sleepovers, tea parties, playing dolls, and dress-up. She remembered hanging out at each other's houses and getting ready for school dances. There had been times when they would stay on the phone until three in the morning, chatting away about everything from boys to clothes. They had even began their once club once. They had been seven, and Riku, Sora, Wakka, and Tidus had formed an all-boys club. Since they were "just a bunch of silly, stupid old girls," they had begun their own club, meeting every day in one of the old shacks on the island, reading magazines, painting each other's nails, and drawing. She smiled. She couldn't draw to save her life, and she had Kairi teach her how to draw a tiger lily – her favorite flower. Tears formed when she remembered a week before all the whole keyblade-saving worlds-Kingdom Hearts thing had begun. She and Kairi had attended her older sister's wedding; Kairi pointed at Quistis and her best friend and maid of honor, Xu, and declared, "Someday Selphie, that's going to be you and me. I'll be your maid of honor at your and Riku's wedding, and you can be mine at mine and Sora's!" She had thought it was a brilliant idea.

The tears quietly slid down her cheeks, as the wind picked up, blowing her brown hair everywhere. "Guess that's not going to happen now," she whispered to the wind. It had been five months ago when they had gotten the news. A bottle had arrived, and inside was a letter with the King's seal on it. Kairi had immediately opened it, seized the contents and read them. A moment passed before a look of disbelief and sadness crept into her eyes. "No..." she whispered, "No! He can't be dead, he's just can't! No!" She had fallen to the ground, sobbing and calling out Sora's name, and all Selphie could do was hug her friend.

She had watched Kairi spiral out of control after that. She had started drinking, partying, and smoking, too. Selphie had tried to stop her, had tried to get her help, but Kairi wouldn't accept it. She had shoved her away, told her to get lost and that she didn't want or need her help. "Just leave me alone, Selph," she had said before slamming her door in Selphie's face. She had left her alone after that. It wasn't that she had wanted to, but she couldn't help Kairi unless she wanted the help.

It was a month ago, on a rainy Tuesday night, that she received her first phone call from Kairi in over a month. That phone call was the one that changed everything.

_"Selphie, it's Kairi."_

_"Hey Kairi, what's up? Are you feeling okay? You don't sound too good."_

_"I'm sorry Selphie."_

_"Huh? Sorry for what?_

_"It's just...do you know what it's like to hurt so bad? To be so unhappy?"_

_"Kairi, what's wrong? What are you talking about? Kairi?"_

_"Goodbye Selphie."_

Immediately after hanging up, she had gone to Kairi's apartment. There was a sick, sweet smell in the air. "Kairi?" she had called, pounding on the door frantically. "Kairi, it's Selphie. Are you there? Open up!" Kairi didn't answer, so she had found the spare key Kairi kept under the mat and unlocked the door. "Kairi?" The lights were off, so she flipped the switch. She wished everyday since then that she hadn't. Kairi was lying in an awkward position on her living room floor, barely breathing. "Oh my...Kairi!" Selphie had run to her best friend's side, ignoring the blood that splashed on her new boots. She lifted Kairi's head up and away from the surrounding blood. "Kairi, can you hear me? Kai? Kai? Answer me! Please, don't be dead." Kairi's left hand moved, and she laid it on Selphie's right. "I just...wanted to see him again. He promised...we'd be together forever," she said, struggling for air. "Hang on, Kairi. I'm calling for help." "I'm so tired..." "Just hang on, help will be here soon."

"But you didn't make it, even though I tried so hard to save you." Her tears were falling harder now, and her grip on the starfish never lessened. "Was it my fault? Was I the one who gave up on our friendship? Or was I too blind to see that you needed me, even when you were pushing me away? Could I have tried harder to save you?" Somewhere off in the distance, a seagull cried. She looked at the pale red starfish in her hand. "You know, they say that if you wish upon a starfish, it'll come true. They claim that starfish are magical little creatures, you know? Of course you do. You grew up listening to the same fairy tales and sailor myths that I did. Well, here's to you, wherever you are, Kairi. I hope it's with him."

The wind picked up, and she closed her eyes, drew a deep breath, and made a wish, then tossed the starfish off of the dock and into the ocean, watching it as it sank down  
down  
down  
down out of sight, carrying with it her memories and wish into the dark abyss.

_-fini  
(♫__And if I only could,  
Make a deal with God,  
Get him to swap our places…__♫)_


End file.
